My life in a heap of rubble did lay,
Cast down and broken into bits of clay.
Tears streaming, I lifted to You my cry,
Heart breaking, I cried out, “Lord God but why?”
“God, I know that all Your ways are flawless,
Each and every deed You do is faultless,
Righteous in all You undertake to do,
No wickedness is ever found in You.””
“Through fiery fires You have tested,
To find the admixtures I have added.
In flames of affliction You cleanse my soul,
So that I will become as refined gold.”
“In stormy waters You have held me fast,
Anchoring me in the strong tempest blast.
You taught me Your promises will hold firm,
Tho’ all around me does give way and churn.”
“Through peaceful valleys You have gently led,
By waters still and pastures green You’ve fed
And there, as I have learned to rest at Your feet,
You have filled and refreshed my worn soul’s need.”
“When placed into combats against the fray,
You’ve clothed me in Your armor and Your strength,
So that in You, I stand and then resist,
The schemes of the Evil One in my midst.”
“When my feet have trodden on wayward routes,
In Your mercy and grace You have pursued.
Though You rebuke, correct and instruct me,
You cleanse my heart and restore joy to me.”
“Through many dark, dim paths You have guided,
To which unknown corners You have added
To teach me to walk with eyes full of faith,
With a firm heart that clings to what You say.”
“Through each circumstance and ev’ry trial,
You hammer and chisel. You mold and style.
You continue the work that You’ve begun
Shaping me to the image of Your Son.”
“But this is more than I can bear, O Lord,
The pain reaches to the depths of my soul
O God, I hurt in so many places.
From You I can’t hide behind many faces.”
“In my life all the work You’ve been doing,
The refining, the molding, the shaping
Is now destroyed into broken, crushed shards,
By Your very hand and the will of Your heart.”
“I have sought to follow with a firm heart,
But at each turn all I find is more hurt.
God, You broke my heart, the work of Your hands.
The pain is far more than I can withstand.”
“My heart is shattered, bleeding and raw.
For me, how can this be the plan You sought?
I trusted You and You gave me more pain.
I loved You and my heart You did break.”
And then the pain in my heart spilled over.
As down my face ran tears of great sorrow.
They were joined by tears of heartbreak and loss.
For I knew that I could no more go on.
I felt a finger on the tears I shed.
Gently, so gently, You lifted my head.
In Your eyes I saw the depths of Your love for me,
As tears trailed down Your face, You spoke these words to me.
“I have loved you from eternity past.
I chose you before the world was made fast
You are cherished and called by my own name,
You’re redeemed by the blood of the Lamb that was slain.”
“You are my child, forever you’re loved.
My masterpiece, you’re treasured from above.
Intricately knit by My loving hand.
My thoughts for you are more than all the grains of sand.”
“You once prayed and asked me to help you find,
The truth that my love is better than life.
Ev’ry pain, tear and joy has played a part
To answer that request you made from your heart.”
And then I watched as the Master knelt down,
And moved the broken shards of my heart all around.
Moments past until he found what he sought,
One splintered fragment of my heart he’d wrought.
Tenderly He picked it up in His hand,
Somehow this rubble was part of His plan.
As the light of this truth pierced to the deep,
I knew that His work was not yet complete.
That day He asked of me but one question
“Will you trust me to teach you this love lesson?”
In my broken heart I felt hope ignite
I looked into His eyes and nodded all right.
I watched as He picked up another piece,
So miniscule it could hardly be seen.
Light flashed from His eyes, love poured from His heart
As He continued the work He did start.
“All the pieces that I join to one another
By the strength of my love will be fused together
For in order for you to truly see
That My love is better than life, this must be.
“Each piece of your life now broken apart
I myself will knit with the love of My heart
Then you will know in your heart, soul and mind
That for you my love is better than life.”
“With my own hand I broke apart your life
Cutting it apart with a wedge and a knife
So that as I knit each piece back together,
In each part, my love you’ll learn to treasure.”
“As you know my love for You in each part
You will learn to love me with all your heart
In knowing my love is better than life
Life without fear you will truly live.”
And so I sat and watched as my Father,
Fused each part of my heart back together.
As I learned to delight in His treasures of love
I discovered the truth that His love is enough.
As I learn that His love is better than life,
I more easily trust His plan for my life.
I learn to rest in the confidence of His plans,
And trust in the work of His faithful hands.
My Father has waited for all eternity
To unfold His loving plans for me
My brokenness in His plan had a part
So that I would know the love of His heart.
In the wonders of His love I have discovered
His love is better than all life has to offer
The treasures of this life cannot compare
As I learn to live in His perfect love and care.
It took breaking my life and my heart
So His love would be woven in each part
For only when there is nothing higher than He
Can I delight in the full measure of His love for me.
His love creates a deep thirst within me
To know Him much more intimately,
The more I know Him, the more I love Him.
The more I love Him, the more I trust Him.
The more I trust Him, He deepens my faith
So I boldly obey in what He saith.
Each day, as I follow where He leads me
He quenches my thirst to know Him more fully.
God, thank-You for loving me enough to break me,
So that Your love infuses each part of me.
In You and through You I have come to see
Better than this life is Your love for me.
It is good to give thanks to the Lord and to sing praises to Your name, O Most High.
To declare Your lovingkindness in the morning and Your faithfulness at night.
For You O Lord, even though it hurts, have made me glad, through Your work. I will shout for joy at the works of Your hands.
For by it You have shown me that Your love is better than life.
You have taught me Your ways so that I may know You better so that I may love You more.
God, my Father, I eagerly await the day when no longer by this tent of flesh will I be hindered from pursuing You will all my heart and loving You with all my being. Until that day, please grant me eyes to see, ears to hear, a mind to understand, a steadfast heart to believe, and willing feet to obey.
And God, thank you for breaking me and fusing me back together with Your bonds of love. Thank you for teaching me your ways. Thank you for not failing me, but letting me go to the depths, for there I found you to be just who you said you are – loving and faithful. It will take all eternity to know You and even then I will fall far short of discovering the depths of Your love, but God please keep teaching me and drawing me closer and closer to Your heart of love.